


Maera and the Lion

by ShadowArtemis4456



Category: Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Adaar is like Maera's older brother, Alternate Universe - Some Canon Divergence, F/M, Mabari, Mage Hawke (Dragon Age), Mage-Templar War, Mages and Templars, Red Lyrium, Red Templars, Solas is an overprotective father
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-28
Updated: 2018-08-25
Packaged: 2019-06-17 08:04:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 14,185
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15456903
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShadowArtemis4456/pseuds/ShadowArtemis4456
Summary: Maera Sephiran is a MGiT and is living every Cullenites dream. Almost. By that, it's meant that she's has difficulties speaking with him due to her past experiences with men. But when her best friend ends up being the Bulwark of a man, or in this case, Qunari Tal-Vashoth named Akoran Adaar, Maera learns she has nothing and no one to fear and Akoran for his part seems content to play Maera's older Brother/protector from the advisors but secretly he ships Maera and the Commander.Cullen finds Maera to be possibly the strangest woman he has ever met, yet he feels a strange attraction to her that makes him wonder about and want to get to know her. yet when he's around her, she is withdrawn signaling to him that something is very wrong. What can he do to start getting her to open up to him? One word: Dogs. It's the only thing that can be considered common ground between them and he will be damned if he doesn't use it to his advantage.(yes I know another one, deal with it lol)





	1. Prologue

It was supposed to be just another normal day. Just another day of a young woman getting out of bed reluctantly, going to work, coming back to her apartment, making sure she ate at the times she had always kept reserved for eating, watch some TV or play some Video Games or read, then back to bed to repeat the process again the next day. What it wasn't supposed to be was the young woman fighting for her life against creatures from her nightmares, but after the almost if not fully apocalyptic levels of an event that had just taken place in her world, this is exactly what the young woman was doing now and she was both grateful and thankful that her parents had paid for those archery and other lessons that were being put to use now and for the "armor" her parents had given to her for a birthday present this past year. The sucky part was, she was running out of arrows and fast and with each one, she sent flying she sent up a prayer to whatever gods existed for someone to come to her aid and soon.  Swiftly she put her bow away and drew her sword and snagged her shield from her back and began the life or death close quarters combat with a whole new opponent that the strange colored green tear had spit out for her to battle. _Please, someone, come soon! All I want to do is get the fuck away from this thing!_ As if a god had finally decided to take mercy upon her, she heard shouting coming from behind her and two people came flying from past her. Neither wore the same armor and thus she figured them for mercenaries, but she couldn't concentrate on them when she had to focus on the creature who was relentless in its assault upon her. She barely managed to block an attack from it when it stuck again and sent her flying through the air with a grunt escaping her which also forced her grip to release upon her sword and shield. Landing heavily on her back, the young woman saw spots in her vision before she managed to partially sit up, her left hand holding her right side and she watched the creature come barreling towards her. _No, I will not die! Not this way!_ She snarled to herself as she forced herself to stand. her sword and shield were too far away and so, yanking her bow back into her hands, she notched her last arrow and took careful aim. Inhaling, she focused on a single spot on the nightmare-inducing creature and on her exhale she release the string and the arrow went sailing. She watched the arrow hit its target and felt just a bit proud as the creature lost its balance before one of the two people struck it down for good. Sighing she felt a sweep of weariness overwhelm her and collapsed as she allowed herself to pass out but she never felt herself hit the ground as someone caught her.

****

The pain that was blooming across her ribcage as she slowly awoke to the world around her, was the only reminder she needed that she had just been injured. Opening her eyes slowly she saw what she could assume to be a ceiling above her and heard whispered voices just outside of the room, she heard what she could rightfully assume was the door opening and shutting gentle behind whoever walked in, "You're awake?" The voice that came to her asked gently and turning her head to the speaker she was slightly shocked to see a man, maybe around her height if not a bit taller, with pointed ears and a bald head watching her with a tenderness she could only assume a father would have for their child. 

"I awoke just before you came in," She told him flinching at how raspy her voice was. She felt the need to sit up strike her and the man was at her side instantly to help her up. "Where..." She started but he seemed to understand exactly what she was about to ask. 

"In a town called Haven," He informed her as he adjusted the pillows to keep her comfortable. Then he took another look at her and frowned as he noticed her confused reaction, "You are not from here?" He questioned as she shook her head. 

"I'm... Wait! Haven? As in Haven in the Frostback Mountains in Thedas?" She looked to him as it suddenly hit her.

"Yes. Why?"

It all come flooding back to her, and she groaned. "I didn't think it was possible..." Turning back to him she sighed, "you might not believe me, but are you at least willing to hear me out?" She questioned as he nodded. When she told him what all had happened to her he frowned. "I...honestly traveling to different worlds like however I managed too is just a theory and like most theories like that where I come from, it shouldn't have even been possible." She shook her head carefully. "But there's more..."

"More?" He raised a brow, he was already coming up with theories of his own on how she managed to come here. When she told him what she knew of him and the others, minus whoever the "Herald of Andraste was", he was surprisingly shocked. "So you know who I am? Then why are you telling me all this?"

"Which answer do you want? I have two of them for those questions alone."

"Whichever you believe the most," He spoke as she felt a stab of pain in her side and winced. Swiftly he tended to her and shook his head as she informed him that she was not one to piss off an ancient elven god.

"That and even if I wanted to I couldn't stop you. It's not my place." She told him as the pain slowly subsided, "What in the living hell was that thing that hit me so damn hard?"

"It was a demon and You fought against it well, but your armor was ruined in the process and it managed to crack three of your ribs which is the pain you feel now," He told her softly as his hand began to glow with a soft energy that followed between his hand on her side. 

"I won't be a challenge to you ah..." She wasn't sure how to address him and he smiled softly. 

"Solas will do just fine." He looked into her eyes and noted the sapphire gaze watching him. 

"As you wish, please call me Maera," She nodded in response to her request. "but I will not be a challenge to you, I would like to be friends if that is possible, but the secret of who you really are is safe with me and it is not knowledge I will ever use against you." She told him as he studied her.

"A beautiful name," he commented on it and watched her blush. The fact that she had admitted what she knew about him to his face surprised him in the least to say, then he thought of something, a way to not only keep her close to him but perhaps even get to know her better. "Have you ever had a father?" he questioned her and she looked away with sorrow. 

"No."

"No?" 

"My mother was into women, and from what I understand the man who sired me didn't take too kindly to that and...raped her."

"I am sorry," Solas apologized swiftly seeing that the mention of her mother upset her. 

"It's not your fault. He...all he served to do was help bring me into this world. Why do you ask?" She turned to him and he told her his plan. 

"This way you will be kept safe," _And so I can keep a close eye on you, to gauge if you are a threat to my plans_. He told her without telling her that last part. "That and it will allow us time to become "friends" as you put it."

"If we do that, it may also evolve into an actual "father-daughter" relationship too," She frowned as Solas smiled. 

"All the more reason I will have the excuse to use that "overprotective" father card when it comes," he told her as she sighed. "Now I need to go talk to others, and you need more rest to allow the cracks in your ribs to heal." He helped her lay back down and she mumbled something about him already acting like a mother hen before she passed out and he smiled before leaving the room to speak with the Herald and the Advisors.


	2. One

"So she is your daughter?" Solas looked towards the one everyone in the room called the Herald of Andraste. This so-called Herald was actually a part of what many called the Qunari race, though this particular one was what they called a "Tal-Vashoth" and thus had no ties to any others of his race that anyone knew of at this time. He was taller than everyone in the room, had horns sprouting from his head, his jet-black hair was tied back into a neat ponytail but it was the fact that his muscle showed how well built the man was compared to the only human male in the room. 

"Yes, Herald, but as I have said she is my long-lost daughter, and thus I only know as much as she told me before I suggested she rest again."

"Surely after facing that demon she didn't come out of that fight unscathed," One of the three human women in the room questioned as Solas turned his head to look at the one who wore a golden ruffled outfit. 

"She did not. She has three cracked ribs all of which I will be, as she put it, "mother-henning" her over until I feel they are properly and fully healed and even then, I would not recommend that she train for at least two weeks after to ensure they are healed."

"Train?" The human man asked looked towards Solas who nodded but it was the Herald who spoke. 

"From what we were witness to, Maera," he looked to Solas who nodded at the questioning of the name, "appears to have quite the skill in the use of sword, shield, and bow." The Herald crossed his arms.

"You keep saying that she is your long-lost daughter, how do you know that she is?" Solas looked towards the only redheaded woman in the room and smiled. 

"To me, Maera is the spitting image of her mother."

"Really?" the herald frowned then, "When I looked at her she slightly reminded me of you."

"To those who don't know her mother, she will look like me, but I knew her mother and knew what she looked like. She is her mother's daughter." 

"You've also stated how Lady Maera remembers coming here from "another world" as she told you."

"Another world that she only remembers to have suffered some type of cataclysmic event that threw her into the Fade and into our world," Solas told the woman who frowned. 

"Then why," the Herald questioned as all eyes turned back to him, "would her mother claim what she did about you to Maera?"

"I cannot say, it could have been a precaution on her mother's part or a warning to keep Maera from trying to find a way here to come to find me." Solas shook his head. "I cannot truthfully say why her mother would claim that, but I can say that I am glad Maera survived whatever happened to that world though I am sure she will be grieving the loss of those friends she did have there." 

"Who wouldn't?" The question was left unanswered as Solas closed his eyes.

"I am eager to meet Maera when there is time," the woman in gold said as Solas looked to her. 

"I will bring her to the war room when she is healed. This way all of you can meet her at once." 

****

To say that Maera took the news of not being able to train well would be a lie. She had all but thrown a fit, but that had been calmed with just a few selected words from Solas. It would still be about a week before the others, but already rumors were spreading of who Maera really was but those were instantly stopped when she was finally able to step out of the little cabin that was now considered hers. Flinching back as the sun blinded her she shook her head to clear it and Solas gave her a moment to adjust to the world around her. "Come Da'len, the Herald, and his advisors are eager to meet you at last." Following Solas through the town (which in her mind was a whole lot bigger than the game let on), to the building that she knew was called the Chantry. She was cautious as she drew close to it, but with Solas there she doubted there would be a reason for anyone to attack her verbally but she felt it would be better for her to stay cautious just in case. Upon entering the building, she felt her metaphorical hackles raise as eyes fell on both Solas and her but all of the eyes eventually turned to her and watched her as she walked. Some eyes had harmless curiosity in them at who she was, others though, had the type of gaze that set her hackles rising higher as she despised those looks. The look of lust. "Do not mind them, Maera," Solas spoke quickly as she looked to him as he smiled towards her. "We are here," he nodded towards the door where the Herald and the Advisors awaited them. Solas led her inside and suddenly five pairs of eyes landed on her but they were filled with nothing more than curiosity so she allowed herself to relax a touch. Introductions were swiftly made and Maera introduced herself as best as she could. 

"You have an odd accent," the one everyone called the Herald, a Qunari now known to her ask Akoran Adaar, noted as she smiled. "It sounds like many different accents put together, why is that?" 

"I grew up in a port town," Maera told him swiftly. "My mother and her wife worked near the docks so I often ran into a lot of strange people who spoke different languages."

Solas's interest was really peaked now, "What all did they do?"

"My mother worked at a stall in the seaside market and my other mother worked in the shipyards as well as on the docks."

"Did you ever work?"

Maera smiled with a slight chuckle, "Of course. If I wasn't at the stalls I could be found in the shipyard running messages from Admiral of the fleet to the captains of the different ships that would come in on a daily basis."

"Which then leads to my question," Maera turned to the man who, though he had informed her of his name being Cullen, spoke now. "Where did you learn to use your weapons?" 

"That's easy. My mother's wife taught me archery, while the Admiral set me up with private lessons for sword fighting with him paying for it despite the many protests of my parents wanting to pay for the lessons themselves."

"Do you have a specialization?" 

"In my fighting style? No." Maera shook her head. "Would I take up one if asked to? Maybe but it would depend on the specialization. Right now I am content with not having one as it's not needed." They spoke some more, with her answering any questions they had for her until finally there seemed to be no more questions and she followed Solas out of the room and back to the cabin that she was using. She still had about a week to go before she was allowed to train and though patience wasn't exactly one of her best vitues, she would be as patient as possible.


	3. Two

Akoran looked around Haven before spotting Maera disappearing into her usual haunt now that she was cleared to wear her armor and take on some training again, and of course, when she wasn't training she was often found in the stables with the horses and other mounts, but more often then not she was always standing near the stall of the "wild" stallion that had been brought in only a few days ago. Yet to Akoran, the stallion didn't seem to be as wild as those who had brought him in had claimed him to be as the moment the great beast had spotted Maera, he had gone ballistic trying to grab her attention and once he had it he had calmed down as she had pet him while speaking soothing words much to the surprise of both the Herald and Cullen, both of whom had tried to keep the stallion calm. Then her next words had really thrown them for a loop as she explained why the beast had gone almost crazy upon spotting her, _"He's my horse. I thought I had been the only one blasted into this world but apparently, he too found his way here."_ She had told them everything she knew of this beast, but it had been her next words that had both Akoran and Cullen thinking, _"The rider doesn't choose his or her horse, the horse chooses his or her rider. He chose me thus I am the only one he will allow to ride him."_

Now as Akoran thought her words over he couldn't help but smile and suddenly his feet were moving of their own accord towards the stables so he could speak with her. As he walked he couldn't help but suddenly remember how he had seen her acting around Cullen and decided to speak with her on the matter. Upon entering the stables, he turned his gaze directly towards where he was sure she would be standing and smiled as he spotted her in her usual stance near her horse's stall. She was leaning against the wall with arms crossed and one foot flat against the wooden wall, yet was still in a "relaxed" state though he had learned that she was still able to spring into action if needed. He noted that her head was turned towards the horse who snorted as she spoke softly to him, and couldn't help the smile that crossed his face as he watched rider and mount interacting with each other. Walking towards her he finally called out her name and her attention turned to him, "Maera, I see you are spoiling him again." 

"Nah, this isn't spoiling. This is just having an intelligent conversation with an animal that actually understands me more often other humans." Akoran laughed at that. 

"Yes that does seem to be the case around here," he smiled as he finished his approach, reaching out to let the stallion sniff his hand before petting him. "So, Maera, I have a question for you."

"I will answer it to the best of my ability unless it's a common sense question. If you need the answer to one of those, then I pity you." She saw the unamused look he gave and laughed. 

"Haha," he shook his head, "No this question is about you and the Commander."

"What about us?" She asked as the man they were speaking of just happened to be passing by and stopped in his tracks to listen in.

"Well it's just...I've noticed the way you act around him. Like you want to say something but are almost afraid too. Are you afraid of him?" Cullen felt himself freeze into place at that as he slowly began to realize that it was a legitimate question and now had him wondering the same thing.

"Yes and no. I'm not exactly afraid per say, but I am more..." She had to stop and think about the proper word she wanted to use, "I'm _unsure_ about him. I've run across several men who, like him, seem frightening at first, and while a few were possibly the biggest sweethearts once I got to know them, the majority were the...unsavory...types. The kind that a woman wouldn't want to be around least she come to regret it."

"So you're unsure about him?"

"Yes. Normally I can easily read people, but the Commander is... I can't seem to get a good reading on him and that's what makes me so unsure about him or what to say around him. It's that unknown factor that makes me a bit more afraid of him than most."

"Would there be any way for you to become not so unsure of him?"

"Only way I can think of would be for him and I to find some common ground, which may not even exist between us."

"What would be common ground? Besides the fact that I watched you knock him flat just yesterday after a round of training."

Maera smiled at that, "That is not common ground for us contrary to the popular belief. Yes, we both have some sort of combat training, but he is a Templar and my training is not as refined as his."

"Understandable," Akoran nodded before frowning, "So what would you consider common ground?"

"Animals."

"Animals?"

"More specifically dogs."

"Dogs? You would see dogs as common ground?"

"Yep," Maera nodded. "But not just any dogs. I'm partial to war hounds and dogs that are part-wolf or look exactly like wolves."

"I take it you like wolves?"

"Love them. To many, they are mindless beasts that need to be slaughtered, but in fact, they aren't. If you ever get the chance watch a pack of wolves, preferably not possessed or controlled by demons, carefully then you will see that they are like us in a way. They live in families, they hunt not for sport but to feed their family, they raise their young, and their packs are made up of the pups, parents, aunts, uncles, grandparents, older brothers and sisters, with the occasional outsider though that last one is rarer. They care for each other, tend to their wounded, mourn the loss of their loved ones."

"Wow..." Akoran and Cullen were both shocked at how much she knew about wolves in general. "You know a lot about wolves."

"I do, but it's because when I look into the eyes of a wolf, I don't see a mindless beast, I see an echo of myself. I see creatures of wild beauty." Maera smiled, "In the other world, there was a particular song that I absolutely fell in love with called Run, Wolf Warrior, Run."

"Sounds interesting."

"It is, I often end up singing to myself if I think no one is around so maybe one day you will get to hear it if you're lucky." 

"I will keep an ear out," Akoran smiled as she nodded. Turning Akoran bid her goodbye and left her and her stallion alone. But as he did, Cullen was standing there thinking off everything he had just heard. She wasn't exactly afraid of him, but she was unsure of him and now he started planning a way to fix that.

****

Maera stood on the dock of the lake of Haven and looked around at the frozen landscape and the icy water. She had vacated the cabin as she cared little for such things and had instead opted to stay in a tent near the training grounds as the noises of the troops training was preferable to her then to the silence of the town, especially when night would fall; that and she often found herself at the nearby lake as something about it called to her, so staying in a tent near it provided her with a means to be both close to the lake and allow her her nightly visits to it, and stay within a distance of her tent should she start growing cold. She did enjoy the peace and quiet of the night and the lake often provided that type of peace and quiet that could only be found at a lakeside when night fell. She gazed out at the vast distance of the lake and ignored her surroundings for the time being, until the crunch of snow was heard as someone came walking over to her. Closing her eyes she immediately identified the footfall to belong to the Commander and spoke before he had the chance to say a word. "What brings you here, Commander?" She questioned as he faltered in his steps for just a moment. She counted that as a point for her as he recovered and drew closer to her.

"I didn't realize it was you, Maera." He said softly as if afraid to break whatever calm had settled on the lake. 

"That tends to happen with anyone who doesn't know me very well." She responded though it was not needed. Cullen looked towards her face and noted that she never looked away from the water that lapped at its shore beneath their feet, "Tell me something Commander," She started as he turned back to her from scanning the water, "Have you ever felt the calm and quiet of a lake at night before?"

Cullen had to think on that for several moments, part of him wondered why she would ask him that but then he shook his head. "Until tonight I've never had a reason to come to a lake at night."

"Hmn," Was all she gave him as she tilted her head a bit. "Then you've never felt the calming peace it can bring to the soul. Especially at night." She glanced at him from the corner of her eye and noticed that he was watching her with curiosity. 

"What do you mean?" 

"Lakes hold their own special magic. One can be felt during the day, which is a very common sensation, it calls to children and adults alike during the heat of summer. But the other, the other can only be felt at night, when the rest of the world is at rest. It is this "magic" that can soothe a weary or wandering soul. It's the sounds of the lapping water uninterrupted by anyone or any animal that begins the calming, yet the real magic is found not in the water of the lake itself but around her that really aids in bringing peace," Maera motioned around as Cullen looked around the lake. "Humans, Elves,  Dwarves, people in general, are often too busy worrying about what they are going to do next sometimes so much so that they don't realize that if they just took a moment to stop at the lakeside at night, that they can renew their weary souls. That the lake itself can heal the soul without using actual magic." Cullen looked back at her with wonder written on his face, the words she was speaking were seemingly directed at him without really being pointed at him. "Every night since I started coming here, I've asked myself why I don't break down crying at the loss of the world I was born and raised in. Then I just came to realize that while yes I should be crying at its loss, I can't. Maybe it just hasn't fully hit me that it's really gone, or maybe some part of me believes this is all just a dream that I will wake up from at any minute, though I doubt that last part as the pain I feel in my side at times is a clear indication that its not a dream."

Cullen had no words for that last part but it wasn't like he could say anything on it. He wanted to tell her he was sorry for her loss, that he would ensure that it would never happen again, yet he couldn't form the words. He felt a bit ashamed at himself for not being able to say anything, yet he was also glad for not being able to as he was sure he'd find some way to mess it all up. When he finally found his voice, he went to start speaking but it soon appeared as if the Heavens themselves had other plans as the moment he asked her name, the clouds parted and the area lit up with the light of the moons and he lost all function of his mind and mouth. As Maera turned to face him, he suddenly saw her in a whole new light. Here in the soft light of the moons, she looked almost like a goddess when compared to the daylight hours. For several moments he couldn't help but study her as his heart suddenly grew a mind of its own and stopped beating for a few seconds. During the day her hair looked like it was dark brown (which she had informed him that her hair was actually blonde but it looked more brown in color), her sapphire eyes were the sky in color, her skin pale, but here at night, her dark hair was almost ebony in color, her eyes were the color of true sapphires and her pale skin, while still pale, seemed to glow under the light that now caressed her like the fingers of a lover. To him, it seemed as if she was the physical human embodiment of the night and this realization made it hard to concentrate on anything but her.  

While he was busy studying her, she was studying him as well. There was a difference in him as well during night and day; During the day his blonde hair shone the golden color of the sun, his eyes with their amber-gold color reminded her of a lion, and all around he was basically the personification of the sun itself and now she could see why. 

 _If she was born for the night, he was born for the day and it showed_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anyone else a fan of Wolf's Rain and recognize the name of the song? Yes? No? here's a link to it anyway: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AV7hW2BGHbg


	4. Three

While Cullen and Maera stood staring at each other under the "transformative" light of the moons, neither noticed that Akoran and one other were watching the two with slight smirks on their faces. Looking at the woman at his side, Akoran spoke quietly. "They definitely need to get together, don't you agree Cassandra?"

The woman, Cassandra sighed softly, her hidden and very romantic heart melting at the sight of Cullen standing with Maera. "Very much so. They are perfect for each other." 

"Are you doing what I think you are?" Akoran smirked as Cassandra looked to him. 

"Am I doing what?"

"Putting those two together to fulfill your heart's desire?" 

"I am doing no such thing!" Cassandra huffed quickly but the light blush on her face said otherwise, "I just believe the Commander might be able to find the redemption he is seeking by helping Maera fill in the void left by the destruction of her world."

"Uh huh," Akoran teased her as she grunted. 

"Ugh! You are impossible!" With that, the woman turned and walked away while Akoran smiled after her. 

 _She is so putting those two together in her head,_ Akoran smiled as he turned back to where Maera and Cullen were now parting ways, Maera was leaving while Cullen was watching after her while blushing fiercely as if he were a schoolboy who had a crush on his childhood friend that was a girl. Where Akoran was standing, he had the perfect view of the lake and the now blushing Commander, but Cullen could not see him. _That's it, I will find some way to get those two together. They both need each other and they don't even realize it, but first I need to get them to find common ground._

****

The next day found Maera walking out of her tent after putting on her armor and stretching her limbs. The sounds of the recruits training echoed from the training grounds, along with Cullen's voice as he barked out the routines and correcting the recruits as needed, the town was not far behind as it became like a beehive the higher the sun rose, and Maera felt more at ease then she had since arriving here. Looking around she caught sight of Akoran as he spoke with the woman named Cassandra, saw Cullen overseeing the troops, and smiled to herself as she ducked inside her tent to grab her bow with its finally replaced arrows. After she had placed the quiver upon her back with the strap of the quiver placed snuggly across her chest, she headed out of her tent once more and walked towards the archery field which wasn't very busy today, but then again the morning hours the archery field was never really busy as the majority of the soldiers were sword and shield users like herself, but she had woken up with her side hurting and figured it would be easier to do some target practice instead of putting her side to the test. Looking skyward after she arrived she figured that an hour or two of target practice would be enough to keep her from getting rusty and soon set out to practice, never once noticing that Cullen had spotted her and was making his way towards her now after leaving the recruits to his second. Watching her as he walked closer he saw that she was wincing as she pulled back on the string and frowned. She looked to be in some pain and he remembered that her side, while fully healed, was still rather sore most days and today looked to be one of those days. He finished his approach but waited to say anything until after she released the arrow. "Are you alright?" he asked quietly as she turned to him. 

"Aside from the fact that I am in a bit of pain, I'm fine." She brushed him off as she looked at the arrows that peppered the target. Walking forward she went to reclaim them and then began to walk back towards him. "But thank you for at least asking," She began to walk away from him and Cullen wasn't sure why but something urged him to follow her for a little bit and he was glad he did as suddenly she grunted as her pain evolved to an unbearable state. Catching her before she could hit the ground, Cullen looked her over worriedly. 

"Maera!" His voice caught the attention of Solas, Akoran, and Cassandra who came running. 

"Da'len!" Solas called out as the moment he arrived. He immediately began to fuss over her and sent a wave of healing magic through her side. "Take her to the Tavern, this cold is not doing her any good." Maera wanted to argue so badly but decided not to when she saw the look on his face. Once she was in the tavern, She was left alone and closed her eyes with a heavy sigh. She heard someone speaking and opened her eyes to look at the speaker and instantly recognized everyone's favorite dwarf. 

"So your the one who Chuckles claimed as his kid." Smirking as she looked him over she realized the games that featured this particular dwarf did the man no justice, though they did get the part about him not knowing the meaning of buttoning his shirt up all the way.

"And you must be the dwarf who is infamous for never buttoning up his shirt all the way but then again I can see why with all that chest hair." She retorted with a slight chuckle as he smiled.

"Varric Tethras at your service, my Lady," Varric smiled as he took a seat across from her. 

"Maera Sephiran, but Maera will do," She informed him. 

"Sephiran?"

"It was my mother's last name and is just a different way to spell sephirem, seraphim, well whichever it is it's supposedly said or pronounced its supposed to be my mother's way to say that my family on her side is supposed to be some type of Angel or at least it was according to her." Maera shrugged. 

"Don't care much for your last name do you?"

"It's rarely used and I rarely tell people what it is. That and all of my old friends used to call me Mara" She informed him as she shook her head. "But I'm sure if I stick around here long enough you will most likely give me a nickname." She closed her eyes as he noted that she seemed to be weary in a way. 

"How are you feeling? You know since the Herald, Seeker, Chuckles and I found you battling those demons."

"Could be worse, Pain in my side gets pretty bad most days but I'm still alive." She told him as she sat forward, "So my turn: how much patience do you have?"

"Well that depends on what you mean," Varric smiled as she smirked.

"I'm bored and I've been meaning to find out about this "Wicked Grace" everyone keeps talking about. So again I ask: how much patience do you have to teach someone who's never played it before how to play it?" Varric gave a shit-eaters grin. 

"You're in for a real treat," And with that, he brought out his deck and began teaching her the rules of the game as well as how to properly play it. As they played a few non-betting rounds to get her more comfortable with the game, in general, they soon had an audience and Varric along with Maera ignored the group even as Akoran and Cullen walked in to check on her, only for them to see the crowd gathered as they entered. Looking to each other they walked over to see that they were in time to witness Maera winning the round of Wicked Grace between her and Varric. They saw Varric looking at her in shock and she leaned back casually with a small smile.

"It's called bluffing, Varric, and it's one of my specialties in a card game." She told the dwarf who frowned. 

"Which games aren't you good at?"

"Chess."

"really?"

"It's literally the only game in any world I've never had the patience for that and I never learned how to play it." 

"You say that now, but how would you handle The Game in Orlais?"

"That? That's nothing. In my world, Our version of The Game is ten times as deadly and thus the pieces must be moved with extreme caution least it causes the downfall and destruction of an entire nation and the people of that nation." 

"Wow..." 

"Yeah, the only reason I even know about it is because of..." Maera looked down towards her hands and that's when the three saw it. On her left hand, on the ring finger, sat a ring that was rather plain. 

"You were engaged to a noble I take it?"

"Not just any noble," Maera looked the ring over and felt her heart breaking as she thought of the one who had given it to her. "He was the son of a noble who abandoned his father's fortune to become a soldier. We met a few years after, and from there we became friends and eventually fell in love."

Akoran spoke up then but his voice was quiet, "How long were you two engaged for?"

"Two full weeks before the cataclysmic event happened to bring me here." That seemed to silence all three men in a heartbeat. 


	5. Four

_Maera's arrows whizzed through the air as shouting sounded all around, "Maera! We can't hold them off for much longer!" A voice screamed over the sounds of cannon fire. The enemies they faced were immune to bullets, thus they had resorted to old style bows, swords, shields and daggers to bring the monsters down._

_"We have to! The Admiral needs more time to get the fleet of our nation as well as the fleets of our allies here!" Maera shouted back as she continued firing arrow after arrow. "Don't let these creatures or whatever the hell they are past the defense!"_

_"Incoming!"  Someone else shouted as Maera looked to see something heading there way._

_"No..."_ Maera's eyes flew open while she lay gasping for air. Sitting up, she rubbed her face with a hand and looked around the area and sighed as she remembered that she was in a tent; closing her eyes once more she allowed herself to remember that she was in Thedas, had joined up with the Inquisition, and was now sitting on her cot in her tent. Throwing her blanket off of her she stood, washed her face with some of the cold water, and dressed for the day despite it still being nighttime. Grabbing her bow and quiver, she decided that sleep was not something she needed more of and thus she left her tent and headed right for the archery area of the training grounds. As she fired arrow after arrow into the targets she barely noticed the crunch of snow under the boots of someone she really didn't want to speak to but it seemed the man had other plans as he waited to speak with her. 

"Maera? Are you alright?" He asked as Maera notched another arrow. 

"I'm fine, Commander, what would make you think anything was wrong?" She asked as she fired the arrow into the target and repeated the process. 

"Well, nothing but..."

"Then there is no reason to ask me if anything is wrong," She released her last arrow and made yet another bullseye. Her temper was short and she knew that today would not be a good day for anyone to speak with her or even question her. She walked forward to replace the arrows into her quiver and turned to walk away from that area, with Cullen close behind. Part of her wanted to snap at him, to tell him to fuck off, yet she did not and managed to keep her irritation at a low level. "What do need from me then Commander?" She questioned as they stopped outside of her tent.

Before he responded he swiftly pulled her into her tent and she frowned but just as she was about to demand to know what he was doing he turned and asked the question she hadn't expected anyone to ever figure out let alone ask, "You are having withdrawals aren't you?"

Maera was frozen in place the moment he asked his question but soon recovered, "So what if I am? It's not like it's any of your damn business," She growled at him, yet he only frowned. 

"I am making it my business," he replied calmly as she glared at him, but he wasn't about to back down. She had to remind herself that this was Cullen Rutherford and that he rarely let things go so easily, and this appeared to be something he wasn't about to let go of.

"Well don't, I don't need your help and I don't want it," Maera turned away from him and went to sit on her cot, but it became quickly apparent that he didn't care what she wanted.

"Maybe you don't want my help, but you do need it.” 

“Jesus H Fucking Christ!” She hissed under her breath. “I said I don’t need **your** help!” She snapped at him, “Go do whatever it is you Commanders do and just leave me the fuck alone!” She snarled as she abruptly stood and made to pass him, but he stepped right in her way. “You sorry sack of-!” 

“Enough!” He snapped back at her causing her to step back as he noted that his “commander’s voice” took her by surprise. “Maera, you may not like it very much, but I _want_ to help you. I _know_ what it feels like to go through withdrawals. Now tell me what is it you are withdrawing from so I can find a better way to ease that process for you.” 

Maera studied him for a moment, met his strange golden eyes. “You wouldn’t know because this world doesn’t have the thing I’m withdrawing from.” With that she shoved past him and left her tent with him on her heels. But the moment he stepped outside of her tent he noted that she was already gone and rubbed his face with a hand. 

He decided at that moment that she was possibly the most stubborn woman in all of Thedas and shaking his head he headed for the training grounds, _She’s a strange and stubborn woman... yet what is this feeling I have that calls me to her?_ He questioned as he stopped in his tracks and looked in the direction he was sure she was headed towards. She was stubborn, yes, but it was attracting him to her like a moth to a flame, or a frog on a suicide mission into the flames. 

Maera was plenty sure they had something in this world that resembled coffee as it wasn’t exactly that she was withdrawing from, it was the thing that was present in the coffee she needed: caffeine. But without her usual five or six doses a day of the caffeinated drink, Maera was pretty sure her days were about to get much worse, and with the pounding headache she felt building up now, she was pretty sure the shitstorm was starting.

**** 

“Solas?” Maera knocked on the door to his little cabin and he called out for her to enter. 

Looking up from whatever he was doing Solas noted the way she looked and motioned for her to sit as he turned in his chair to look at her, “What is the matter Da’len?” He asked as she frowned and explained while fighting the urge to place her head in her hands. “So without this drink you are having withdrawals?” 

“If that’s how the Commander saw it when I all but bit his head off then yes.” She nodded as she closed her eyes as another stab of pain blasted through her head like a bullet. Frowing Solas reached out and sent a wave of gentle healing magic into her skull to drive away the pain. “Are you aware of how soothing your healing magic is?” She questioned as he smiled. 

“That should last you until you wake up tomorrow. Until then I will see if I cannot find something to help ease some of the pain of your withdrawals, once I have it I will send it your way.” 

“Thanks Pops,” She told him not realizing what she had just said to him, which caused his heart to squeeze in his chest. 

“You’re welcome Da’len, now run along and let me return to work.” He smiled as she nodded and left him be. But as she walked away he couldn’t help the tender and fatherly smile he gave in her direction. Shaking his head he returned to work as well as sought out a way to help ease her withdrawals. 

While he did that, Maera went straight to the stables to visit with her stallion who blew warm air into her face. “Well hello to you too Blackie.” She smiled as she kissed his nose. “Who is the most handsome stallion around?” She questioned as he threw his head up and nickered. “Yep! It’s you!” She smiled as she rested her cheek on his forehead. “I wish we could go for a ride, but I doubt General Uptight, Sister Nightingale or the Lady Ambassador would like that very much.” 

“I wouldn’t mind it,” a voice spoke up startling Maera and caused her to turn and see one of the three spoken of people walking into the stables. 

“Oh! Sister Nightin-err Leliana!” Maera tried to correct herself much to the older woman’s amusement. 

“Please, Leliana will be just fine,” Leliana smiled as Maera nodded. 

“As you wish,” Maera looked to her horse who snorted then back to the older woman. But before the younger could speak Leliana motioned to her own horse. 

“I was actually planning on going for a small ride myself, would you care to join me?” 

“I would love too,” Maera nodded as she and Leliana fetched the needed items to saddle and bridle up their respective mounts. Once that one achieved they led their horses out of the stables and, once they were in the saddles, Maera and Leliana went for a ride to stretch the legs of the horses and to talk.


	6. Five

Maera's stallion snorted as she rubbed his neck. She had just returned with Leliana after a small chat and a short ride and now was brushing out her horse who was being a bit of an ass as he played around. "Stand still you goofball of a horse!" Maera laughed as the stallion snorted towards her. "I can't brush you if you continue to dance around like this," She smiled as the stallion pulled away. "Fine, no apples for you then." She heard him protest but shook her head. "No. Not unless you stand still so I can brush you."

"So a birdy told me that you and the Spymaster went out for a ride." Turning her head to see who had spoken, Maera was met by the sight of Akoran walking up. 

"Yeah, she just wanted to know more about me and the breeding of my horse."

"What is his breeding?"

"In my world, he would be known as a Friesian, its an expensive breed and more so if the lineage of the horse in question can be traced back many years."

"And his can be traced?"

"Yep. But unlike many of his breed, he was trained to be a warhorse."

"Really?" That surprised Akoran and she nodded, "then how are you the only one he will allow to ride him?"

"Don't ask me, he's a picky horse is all I can tell you," Maera smiled as she finally managed to begin brushing the stallion out. "Mind grabbed the a.p.p.l.e over there and cutting it up into slices?" She nodded towards the area where an apple was sitting. Nodding he walked over and began slicing it up as the stallion's ears went forward at the smell of the apple being cut. Snorting the beast stomped his forehooves and Maera corrected him. "You have to finish getting brushed first." She told the horse who protested again but obeyed the will of his mistress. Once she was done Akoran walked over, looked at her and she nodded. He carefully held out his hand with a slice of apple and the stallion took it gently. much to Akoran's surprise. "He's always taken things gently. Don't ask me why even I'm not sure." Akoran looked to her as he continued to give the stallion the apple slices then looked back to the horse who nickered in approval of the man after the last slice was given. “Anyways, was there something you needed, Herald?” 

“I just wanted to speak with you is all, but I think I have gotten more then I bargained for. Thank you.” Akoran turned to Maera who nodded before she led the stallion to his stall while Akoran left them alone.

****

Maera was sitting on her cot, head in her hands as she rubbed at her eyes. She was tired as could be yet her body was fighting sleep. The caffeine withdrawals were kicking her ass and the nightmare from the previous night wasn’t being much help either. Looking towards the entrance to her tent she could see that it was damn well past the hours of sunset, but still she just couldn’t sleep; sighing to herself she dropped her hands to rest the heels of her palms on the cot and, closing her eyes, she let her head drop as she inwardly debated with herself on whether or not she wanted to go see if she could find something to drink but was soon shaken from those thoughts when she heard someone knock on the wood of one of the poles that held up the tent. Not bothering to look up she waved the person in and heard the sound of boots making their way towards her, and from the sound of said boots, she could guess that it was Cullen who was coming to see her. “Are you alright, Lady Maera?” 

“Why do you ask?” She questioned, her voice wasn’t hostile but nor could she muster the energy to speak in anything but a tired tone. He seemed to note this and she felt his eyes rake over her, gauging to see if she was upset or actually tired. 

“I saw the candle,” he nodded to the thing sitting on the makeshift desk and continued, “I thought by now you’d be at the lake, or at least prepared for sleep.” 

“Tonight is not a lake kind of night for me I’m afraid. I had a rather vivid nightmare last night.” She told him but when he said nothing she didn't bother to continue. She knew he would worry even if she went to protest (this was Cullen, he was practically a mother fucken hen when it was called for). “I could try sleeping but I doubt it would work for when the soul is just as weary as the mind.” 

Studying her closely, Cullen could tell that something was wrong but wasn’t sure exactly what it was until he noticed that she had trails of her tears on her cheeks and then he realized it. “You miss your home.” 

Maera didn’t bother to respond but he could see it the moment she looked up he noted how her eyes were red from her crying while her normally sapphire colored eyes seemed darker then what he was used to seeing. “How could I not?” She asked trying hard to keep her sorrow from sounding in her voice, “Everything I know, everyone I loved and cared for... it and they are all gone. Yes I have my stallion but... it’s just not the same thing.” Her head dropped down again, “How can anything ever be the same again? I promised, swore to my parents, that I would return to them but...” her voice trailed off as she rubbed at her face in the attempt to wipe away tears. Cullen wanted to pull her into an embrace at that moment, to hold her while she cried as there was just some part of him that hated seeing a woman cry, some little part of him that wanted to comfort them and drive away the tears and that feeling was surprisingly intensified around her as if his very soul wanted to comfort her; but he held himself back. It was not his place to comfort her, to hold her, but that didn’t mean that he didn’t want to. “I’m sorry that you’ve had to see me like this.” She apologized as he studied her for a moment. He was a mere few minutes away from pulling her into an embrace and was losing his resolve with each second. 

“Don’t apologize for that, you’ve been carrying that heavy burden since your arrival. It is not weak to cry for the loss of everything you knew or the ones you’ve loved and lost.” He told her swiftly as she continued to stare at the ground. Sighing, Cullen finally lost his resolve to not touch her and thus, moving to kneel down infront of her, he lifted her head to meet his eyes and gave her a very soft smile. “Cry for them, cry for what you have lost, it doesn’t make you weak. It makes you stronger,” he told her before pulling her into an embrace. Taken by surprise it took Maera a moment to realize that he was comforting her and soon buried her face into the fur mantle around his shoulders as she felt the floodgates burst open.


	7. Six

Maera was fidgeting with something as she sat just outside of her tent. A few days had zipped by since she “allowed” herself to break down in front of Cullen and now she was avoiding him as if he were like the plague; it wasn’t because he had comforted her in that moment of weakness, it was because she hated, absolutely _hated_ , showing weakness in front of anyone and to her crying in front of anyone was a sign of weakness. Family, friends, completely random strangers who were becoming something more than strangers while not yet becoming friends, it didn’t matter to her. Crying in front of any of them was a form of weakness and right now she was hating every part of herself for it. “Da’lan? Are you alright?” Solas’s voice questioned as she looked to see him sitting down next to her. 

“Just thinking is all,” she replied as she looked away from him. 

“You’ve been crying,” it wasn’t a question as much as he was stating it but Maera sighed and answered anyway. 

“I... The loss of my world has finally caught up to me I think... the Commander... he... saw me crying a few days ago...” Maera admitted as Solas studied her carefully. 

“And you’ve been avoiding him since,” Maera nodded as Solas shook his head. “Maera, listen to me,” he took her chin into his hand and gently forced her to look at him. “Crying over loss is natural. It is not a weakness to cry for what you have lost.” 

“But crying in front of someone who is nothing more then a completely random strange is!” Maera tried to argue but Solas wasn’t having any of it. 

“No, my child, it is not,” He watched her almost deflate and felt a pang of sorrow strike his heart. “Cullen does not wish to remain a stranger to you. I’ve seen the way he watches you, he wants to be friends with you, to show you that you can trust him.” 

“But I...” 

“Go to him Da’lan. Speak with him.” Solas kissed her forehead then stood and walked away leaving Maera staring at the snowy ground. Sighing Maera stood and looked in the direction she figured the Commander would be in, she wasn’t entirely sure what to say to the man but she figured the least she could do was apologize for avoiding him like she had been. Walking towards the training grounds she stopped in her tracks and frowned as she realized that it most likely wouldn’t be proper for her to interrupt him if he was training the troops and so, turned on her heel and headed straight for the tavern, named The Singing Maiden, where she could at least snag something to eat and possibly see if the owner of the tavern, Flissa, didn’t at least have something stronger then the watered down ale she served there due to Cullen not wanting his men to be completely wasted and unable to function the next day. Halfway there, however, Maera ran right smack into Cullen who barely caught her in time to prevent her from gaining a few new scrapes. 

“Maker’s breath! I’m so sorry Maera!” Cullen started apologizing as Maera looked at him. 

“Its fine... you’re fine... I wasn’t watching where I was going,” she told him before she stepped a bit off to the side and made to pass him. _Nope, I’m too damn sober for this,_ She thought to herself as she walked past him, but it quickly became apparent that Cullen had other plans as he called out to her. 

“Lady Maera! Wait!” Maera stopped in her tracks and looked back towards him. He caught up to her and frowned as he rubbed the back of his neck. “I wanted to...apologize...” 

“For what?” Maera questioned as she watched him with confusion. 

“For making you feel like you need to avoid me,” He told her never once looking at her; finally he looked into her eyes and saw her bewilderment as his words caught up to her slow acting mind at that moment, “If I’ve done anything to offend-!” 

“Wait, you believe you’ve offended me?” She asked as he nodded. Sighing, Maera closed her eyes and shook her head as she used a single hand to rub at her eyes. “Jesus Christ...” she muttered low, “Commander, you haven’t done anything to offend me, it takes a lot to offend me believe me. No, you didn’t do anything at all. In fact, it's almost the opposite...” she informed him before looking at him to see his relief. “I’m...” she wondered how she was going to word what she was about to say next then decided to just say it, “For me, crying in front of anyone is a sign of weakness. A person could tell me that it's not a million times over, but it will always be that way to me. For me to cry in front of anyone is a sign of my own weakness and...that's one of the things I hate the most about myself.” She told him before she turned away from him completely, “It’s how I’ve always been,” She let that last word linger in the air as she began to walk away from him. Silently she knew she was too sober for this conversation and was glad that he didn’t reach out to stop her from walking away, but what she didn’t know was that he was standing and wondering what she meant when she had said that crying was “one of the things” she hated about herself. Wonder and worry planted themselves firmly into Cullen’s mind now for her but if anything he knew that right now would not be a good time to pursue that subject further, though he did make a mental note to bring it up with her at a later date and time.

****

Maera blinked and shook her head as she turned down another drink that Flissa was offering to her, “I think I’m good Lady Flissa.” Maera told her as the woman smirked. 

“I’m no “lady” ma’am, but it is good to see that at least someone around here has the sense to slow down or stop completely,” the woman smiled as watched Maera shake her head slowly, Flissa turned away and walked back to behind the bar but spotted the Commander walking in. “Who are you looking for Commander?” She called out as he looked towards her. 

“Is Lady Maera here?” He watched as Flissa nodded to where Maera looked like she was about to fall out of her chair and he frowned.

“Smart woman she is," Flissa smiled warmly towards Maera who had finally planted her face onto the table, "had four of the non-watered down stuff and stopped me as I was preparing to set down the fifth one for her.”  

Cullen looked a bit surprised at that but then nodded, “Thank you,” he told her as he made his way towards Maera who was a bit out of it. “Lady Maera?” Cullen questioned as Maera looked up at him, before lowering her head to rest it back on the table. He could tell she was going to have one mother of a hangover and that thought brought a smile to his face, but he forced himself to keep neutral as he reached out to touch her wrist. “I believe it is best if I escorted you back to your tent?” 

“Probably,” Maera said as she attempted to stand. She felt him catch her as she lost her balance and frowned, "Okay maybe four was one too many," She muttered as he led her out of the tavern. As they walked, or rather as he walked with her doing a bit of stumbling while he smirked, towards her tent she immediately apologized to him.

"For what?" Cullen asked as he looked at her.

"For anything, I will eventually say being..." Her mind spaced out on her and she shook her head to clear up the fog that had settled over her brain, "I can't think right now... I am apologizing for anything I'm likely to say while being not so sober because I also know I will have no recollection of it tomorrow," She explained or tried to it was getting harder for her to think as the alcohol in her system began to make its way through her body properly. They made it to her tent without much incident, well if one didn't count the fact that Akoran had spotted them and had hoisted her into his arms to carry her the rest of the way while Cullen led him while she had passed out in the Herald's arms. Akoran smiled as he pulled up her blanket then spoke as Cullen watched him. 

"She is starting to open up to you, Commander," Akoran turned his head towards the man and frowned. "If you break her heart as a future friend of hers, I will see to you that you live in a living hell for the remainder of your days and I don't mean the lyrium route." He watched as Cullen nodded then turned and left the tent as Cullen looked towards Maera before he too left the tent.


	8. Seven

Maera had a massive hangover the next day, and was sitting just outside of her tent and was rubbing her temples when the crunching of snow captured her attention; looking up towards the reason of the crunching snow she spotted Varric and watched as he stopped before her to hold something out for her. "Heard you got the good stuff last night, Flissa sent this as a way to help lessen the hangover." 

"Lifesavers both of you," Maera said as she took whatever it was from Varric and drank it. She almost gagged on the taste and saw the dwarf smiling. "Do I want to ask what that was?" 

"Probably not," he told her as she frowned, but before he could speak again Akoran came walking up.

"Just the two I was looking for," Both Varric and Maera turned to him and he smiled, "You both have just earned yourselves a trip with Cassandra and me to Redcliffe." 

"Well, Fuck." Maera sighed as Varric mumbled a curse. "When do we leave?"

"This afternoon," Akoran told her as she sighed again.

"Alright, I'll get my stuff and saddle up my horse," Maera spoke as Akoran and Varric left her alone to get prepared. As she gathered up her equipment and checked over the blade of her sword she heard someone knock on the wood of the pole that was the entrance to her tent and glanced to see the Commander standing there, "Yes?" She asked as she frowned and went to find her Whetstone to sharpen the blade real quick. 

"I understand the Herald is taking you with him?" 

"Yes, he is," Maera nodded as she sat down to sharpen the edges of her blade. As she did that, Cullen watched her carefully before studying the blade in her hands. He could see that it had been used many times, but it was also well taken care of and suddenly a thought crossed his mind.

"Is that a family heirloom?" He questioned as she paused and turned to him. 

"It has been passed down for generations in my family. It has a twin, but where that blade is I don't know," She explained as Cullen studied the sword she held.

"I do," He said before leaving quickly. She wondered what he meant by those words, but shrugged and returned to tending to her blade, she was about to sheath it when he reappeared with his own family sword in hand. He quickly unsheathed it and Maera, for her part, studied it carefully after she sheathed her own sword. "It might be a bit-!" Whatever he was about to say was lost as Maera took the sword carefully and tested its balance. 

"It's not too heavy, just a bit unbalanced as this particular blade was made for whoever the opposite wielder is of its sister blade." Maera lifted the blade and set one of its edges upon the back of her hand and stared down the blade. "Grab my Whetstone," She told him and he did, "These types of blades are particular about the type of stone used for sharpening their edges," She lifted the blade carefully from the back of her hand to see a red line of blood well up. Studying the other side of the blade she frowned, "Sharpen both sides carefully tonight. She told him as she offered the sword back to him, of which he took carefully before sheathing it. "Do you know the name of him?" She nodded towards the blade he held and watched his face fill with bewilderment. 

"Name?" 

"All weapons have names, Commander. As my mother's father told her and as she told me: "To know ones truest self is to know the weapon one will wield"."

"That doesn't make much sense," Cullen commented as Maera smiled.

"Maybe to you it doesn't. But to me it does," She told him as she picked up her sword and unsheathed it once more, "This old girl is named Heartseeker, and she has proven true to her namesake." Maera said as she allowed him to take it up for a moment.

He felt that it was unbalanced and realized that Maera was right, Heartseeker was not a blade meant for him to wield. "Then what is the name of my family's sword?" He questioned as she took Heartseeker back. 

Maera decided to be a bit cryptic for shits and giggles (she knew the name of the blade already but wasn't about to share that with him) and smiled at him, "Only you can discover that, Lion of Ferelden. Listen for a whisper when next you draw the blade. If he should feel you are the one to wield him, he will speak to you though it may not be as direct as you would think." She told him before she sheathed her blade, attached it to her belt, scooped up her shield, quiver, and bow, and walked out of her tent to go prepare her stallion for the ride to Redcliffe leaving Cullen to step outside of her tent and watch her as she walked away. Looking to the sword he held in his grasp, he wondered what she had meant by her words but decided to let it stew for a bit in the back of his mind. And it would be while Maera was gone with Akoran, that the name of the blade struck Cullen hard. He was tending to his usual business of training the troops when part of it snuck up on him. He kept hearing the word "Faith" over and over and, at first, he was mostly able to ignore it until he was alone and looking at the sheathed blade before something came back to him, a story of the twin blades Heartseeker and Faithkeeperm and the words Maera had spoken after she had told that story came haunting back to him. _"It is said that Heartseeker and Faithkeeper were forged from the parent sword Faith's Heart when it shattered into several pieces. But there is a rumor surrounding one of the blades as well. A rumor that pegs Heartseeker as cursed, as the last owner of the blade was slaughtered by her best friend because she fell into corruption. The last owner of Heartseeker had the last name of Serphiran, and she was my ancestor. I do not know if the last owner of Faithkeeper had any children or grandchildren, but if I recall right, his last name was something close to, if not, Rutherford, but I can't say if there is actual proof of that."_

Cullen felt his heart stop as he realized what exactly his family sword's name was and it caused his blood to run cold as his heart paused in its tracks. _Faithkeeper_. And with that sudden chill, Cullen came to another harsh realization: Maera was carrying Heartseeker. Maera was carrying a cursed blade that most likely would cause her to fall into corruption. His eyes went wide and he felt as if the world itself had stopped all while he stared at Faithkeeper. "No..." 


	9. Eight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have some feels. I think mine kinda went a bit spazz with this one.

_Maera was gripping the edge of Faithkeeper where it had pierced her own heart. "Maera..." She heard his voice, a voice she would recognize anywhere and looking up from the blade that he still held the grip of, she could see the tears that he was weeping. Her vision was starting to blur and starting to blacken at the edges as she looked into his handsome golden eyes to see that those lion-like eyes were becoming glassy with his tears as he watched her dying form fall to her knees. Her hair, which was normally put up into a ponytail, was allowed to fly freely as the wind picked up._

_"I told you... Cullen..." She managed weakly as she stared into those eyes she had once loved so dearly. "Heartseeker is a cursed blade. It has always tempted my family into cor...ruption..." It was becoming harder for her to speak and he knew it, "I guess...I was too weak to fight the process..." Her voice trailed away as her eyes closed while she felt herself beginning to fall backward, felt him pull Faithkeeper away from and out of her chest before he leapt to his knees and caught her before she could fall._

_"Maera! Maera!" He called out to her, trying to bring her back, yet it was too late. Her spirit had fled her body and he felt as if her soul had taken all the good of the world with it. "Mae...Maera..." He watched her closed eyes, praying they would open, praying that this was a dream and not the truth. "Maera...I..." His tears were drenching his cheeks as the rain became a downpour all around him. Pulling her close, he rested a hand into her locks while his free arm was wrapped around her torso; he pulled her face closer to him as he buried his own face into her hair, hair that smelled of raspberries and tea which somehow mixed perfectly with her scent of lavender and rain. Cullen wept as he held her, he wept for the days they had spent together as friends, as lovers, and wept for the days that he would now spend alone. He wept for it all and as he went to scream out his rage and frustration. He woke._

Gasping as he opened his eyes, Cullen looked around his tent for a moment before raising his hand to his cheek to feel what he knew to be the trails of tears. He wondered what had caused him to have that kind of dream, yet something told him that it was no dream. Shaking his head, he dressed quickly and went out to enjoy the cool air of the night in the hopes that it would calm his nerves as he thought over the dream. It had been about two weeks since Maera had left with the Herald, and for reasons Cullen could not explain to save his life, he was fretting over the fact that she was gone. As that crossed his mind, he figured that that was the true reason behind that odd dream which sent a shiver down his spine; but another thought soon crossed his mind: If anyone could interpret this strange dream Cullen had just had, it would be Solas. Reluctant as Cullen was about going to the apostate elf, something in him told him that going to him would be wiser than letting the dream haunt him.

Thankfully, as Cullen went to find the man, Solas was sitting outside of his cabin and looked up to see the Commander approaching him. "I believe I can already guess as of to the reason why you are seeking me?" Solas spoke up as he stood and motioned for the Commander to enter the cabin. As they spoke of the dream Solas studied the Commander with the barest hint of a smile. "What you saw was not you and her, but your ancestors of the same names."

"How do you know?"

"Maera had the same dream a week ago," Solas handed Cullen a letter he had received from Maera. Cullen saw that she wrote in Orlesian. Studying the words carefully, Cullen noted that each word was written with great care as if she had had difficulties writing and heard Solas laugh. "She does not have difficulties writing, in fact, I've seen how she writes. She has a very creative mind, and thus she has to write a bit slower because her handwriting is normally a bit...well sloppy wouldn't be the right word for it." 

"Can she write in Common?" 

Solas smiled, "She is multilingual, she knows many languages and can read and write in everything but my language of birth, though she is becoming quite proficient in that as well." Solas remarked with a proud fatherly tenderness. “But because of how creative she is, her writing suffers a fair amount for it.” 

Cullen read Maera’s letter carefully and was slightly shocked to discover that it was almost carefree as if Solas was the only one she dare to confide anything in. “She seems so...” Cullen struggled to find the right words but Solas understood perfectly where he was coming from. 

“Yes, she does,” Solas shook his head. “Tell me, have you started finding a way to earn ground with her?” 

“I...No.” 

“Your best bet? Get her a dog.” Solas spoke no more after that and Cullen understood that he was “dismissed”. Turning and walking out of the building Cullen went to do something he thought he would never do: He went to go find a mabari or two.

****

Maera sat astride her stallion whose mane was braided into five different braids, and the proud beast snorted as he followed Akoran’s gelding. Maera had been glad to discover that the Blacksmith at Haven was happy to work on the barding that her stallion, named Dusk, and the other horses wore now. Honestly, the barding, which served as armor for the horses, reminded Maera of the armor of the horses from one of her top five favorite games: World of Warcraft. Dusk snorted and instantly her thoughts floated to the mount called the Seabraid Stallion, but unlike that horse, Dusk did not have the part to store anything or have a lantern. Maera leaned forward and patted Dusk gently and the stallion nickered softly. “He looks very regal and truly like a horse born for war,” the woman riding next to her spoke as Maera turned to see a woman, named Cassandra who looked every part the hardened warrior woman she was, studying Dusk. 

“His breeding is pure and one day he will sire many valuable and loyal war horses,” Maera told her. “His breed of horse is born as one of the most majestic breeds out there. But I trained him to be the warhorse he is.” Maera frowned as Cassandra studied her now as well. 

“You would have made a perfect Seeker.” 

“Pardon?” 

“A Seeker of Truth. You would have been a born natural for it. The way you hold yourself. Everything about you says you would be a perfect Seeker. A prime example of what the Order stands for.” 

“I doubt that very much, but I do thank you.” 

“Maybe once we return to Haven we can discuss more on the subject?” Cassandra asked hopefully as Maera thought it over. 

“I will think about it, Lady-Seeker,” Maera told her as Cassandra studied her with wide eyes but before she had the chance to say anything Maera nudged Dusk a bit and the stallion moved up to Akoran’s side. 

“Herald, where are we headed next?” 

“To see a man named Master Dennet. According to what I heard his horses could be invaluable to the Inquisition and I am sure once he spots your dear stallion, he will want to speak with you about breeding him out.” 

“I see.” Maera sighed as Akoran looked to her before leaning over and whispering in her ear. 

“I also am hoping to one day have a war horse from him that comes from your stallion’s proud bloodline.” 

Maera laughed then, “Oh my dear Herald,” she said a bit louder capturing the attention of Cassandra and Varric, “You’d get the first pick of any of his offspring but just know when he does have offspring, I need to look them over first.” 

“I wouldn’t expect anything less from you.” Akoran smiled as Maera smiled. “We are almost there.” He spoke as Maera pulled gently on the reins to pull Dusk back a bit, yet as they drew closer to Dennet's home only to stop for the night, Maera couldn't help but let her thoughts wander to the days before the cataclysmic event that had brought her to Thedas as she lay down to sleep.

_Maera stood looking at the Admiral with shock written upon her face. "You would doom us all to a fate like that?! This world would be nothing but a wasteland!"_

_"Maera, I am doing what I need to do, even if it means condemning our people to death."_

_"THere has to be another way!" Maera told him, stepping towards him as he frowned._

_"If there is then it is too late to use it. I am sorry, my granddaughter, but this is the only way to save our world from humanities stupidity."_

_"NO! I know there is another way, there is always another way!" Maera snapped as she moved a foot forward. "I will not see our people burn because of the actions of one moron! I refuse to allow the people to starve and fall to nothing because we cannot temper ourselves!" She told him as he watched her._

_"My grandbaby, you always were such a naive little girl but this once I want you to listen to me." He watched as Maera had tears in her eyes that he knew she would not shed. "There is a far greater threat heading our way, one that we cannot defeat as we could never prepare for it. It would kill us all anyway. What the leaders of the world have agreed upon is that what we shall being doing... it is a mercy."_

_"How is it a mercy?! This is slaughter! You won't be killing off just the human race but countless animals species as well!" Maera couldn't understand why he was being so calm about it and thus she closed her eyes and shook her head before a hand touched her cheek._

"Da'lan, open your eyes." _And as Maera did she saw Solas standing in her grandfather's place while looking towards her with great sorrow,_ "I have something I wish to tell you."

"Solas?"

"Listen carefully, for what I am about to tell you may result in shock..."  _And as Solas told her what he did Maera looked away from him to look back towards the people she once loved, even her former lover._ "If anything, what I have just witnessed proves to me that you are more my daughter then you ever were you're mothers' daughter."

"But...Why? Why do you have to tell me the truth when my own mother could not?"

"I cannot answer that,"  _Solas explained as he gently forced her to look at him again,_ "Forgive her, forgive them, forgive me for not being the father you should have had growing up, and more importantly forgive yourself. I can see that it pains you to see that no matter what you thought you could do, that you couldn't save your people."

"What about you?"

"I want to save our people still, and if I must bring down the veil to do so then I will."

"Then what will happen? Won't this world be destroyed as well? I don't think I could live through another thing like that."

"For you, ashalan, I will think on finding another way to bring it down."  _He promised her as he kissed her forehead before he looked into her blue eyes with a gentle smile,_ "You would have been a perfect elf."

"Well I am half-elf,"  _She returned as he nodded in agreement._ "and _..._ I forgive you, babae. I forgive you... I forgive them...and I forgive my mother..." _Maera told him as he felt his heart melt and kissed her brow._

"Rest, ashalan. The demons of your past will no longer haunt you." _He told her as she looked up at him, and for a moment he wished she was a child so he could hold her close._

"Stay for a while?" 

 _Solas smiled softly,_ "Of course, ma'ashalan." _Maera felt him pull her close and hugged him in return. She had one more question but for the moment, that could wait._


End file.
